Going Rogue
Going Rogue
(I so adore and respect this younger version of myself! What all she/me/we/I have survived and the ways we’ve grown are incredible.)
This adventure began a very long time ago, however I will start the story here.
I’m 57 and a half, in questionable health, with a well below poverty level income and in a couple of months I am leaving the comfort of my known for the unknown. I want to have an epic, boisterous, the worry my sibs, kids and friends kind of adventure.
Why not leave now?
Fair enough question.
The short answer is I’m prepping – and have been for about 5 months.
The long answer is mostly about my questionable health. Six months ago I was diagnosed with heart failure for the 2nd time. I beat it 20 years ago and I will this time too.
I got a stint and a half dozen heart meds. A month later I was diagnosed with a meningioma, a type of (usually) benign brain tumor that I’m still awaiting treatment for. Hell, I’m still waiting my 2nd neurosurgeon appointment.
Anyhoo – on the plus sides…
I’ve been awarded SSI/disability (income finally!) and have had surgery in both eyes for cataract removal – with a real groovy bonus of mostly corrected vision. After 51 years, I don’t have to wear corrective lenses! I wake up in the morning and I can see!
Silver linings are groovy!
After breaking up with the estranged boyfriend/housemate/whatever (another part of the story) I’ve been staying with a friend, healing in body, mind and spirit by dreaming of what I want. My previous choices and dreams have included the needs and desires of others like family, kids, spouses (now former) and (sadly) cultural conditioning.
Between the heart and tumor, I’ve gotten (finally) selfishly focused on me.
NOTE: You don’t have to wait until it’s “your turn” – You absolutely have the right and deserve to focus on your needs. Indeed, focusing on your needs is the healthy way to be. LESSON LEARNED.
I’d like to make my own cob or tiny home with a permaculture garden and a large geo dome tropical greenhouse. I’m considering the possibility of hooking up with some other peeps in a like-minded community – maybe.
YouTube has become my favorite go-to for delving into my next steps.
I’ve watched about a hundred tiny home shows, cob building, and permaculture tutorials and other homesteading off-grid shows. I’ve checked out about 20 books from the library and even went to a tiny home expo.
I’m excited about my future.
That’s the Magnetic North dream.
Prior to that I will build my homesteading/permaculture skills and decide where to sink my roots. This is the part likely to freak some people. I get goose bumps thinking about it too; a sure sign it’s going to be exhilarating.
I’m looking into being a volunteer at organic farms around the country (Gotta love room and board!). I will also be traveling on my own and essentially living in Sparky (my older Honda CRV), staying at national and state parks and boon docking, visiting gardens and vistas.
I will see about getting some building experience by volunteering too.
Houseless is not homeless. Yeah Baby! About time!
The past year and the 2 before have felt horribly shitty but those are past chapters
While I wait for my brain treatment and healing, I’ve got some actual closures to take care of. I’ll be headed back up the hill to my own home and paring down to below minimalist – that’s the goal anyway. Close up my house, the relationship and those shitty chapters.
I might need to get some more sage to burn and a few more crystals…
Life is Groovy!
Bright Blessings!
Carol
Thank you for reading this older post – I hesitated including these and I flipped and flopped and overthought and then decided it would be worth including these as they may be useful to someone else on their own journey.
They not so elegantly document the messiness – and therein lies the beauty and purpose.
If you’d like to work with a life coach who’s walked some dark paths and also played with rainbows and fireflies please feel free to contact me here for availability and pricing.